Residents of the picturesque Isle of Cumbrae have been left both amused and bewildered after a surprise flood of sex toys washed ashore on Millport’s beaches in the wake of Storm Amy.
The bizarre discovery was made by two local dog walkers on Newton Beach, who were stunned to find the sands littered with an unexpected cargo of dildos and other adult gadgets. Concerned that children might stumble upon them, the pair quickly gathered up as many as they could — though not before word spread through the small island community.
The Buzz After the Storm
The strange scene unfolded on Friday, October 10, as Storm Amy battered the west coast of Scotland. But even after the weather calmed, more of the mysterious toys continued to wash up over the weekend, causing quite the stir among locals.
“It was a load of sex toys that washed up – the village has been buzzing ever since,” laughed Lesley McDowell, 59, a barmaid at the Newton Bar. “Luckily it happened when it was quiet, and no kids found them. We don’t know where they came from — but there’s definitely none in the bar!”
McDowell added, “Apparently a guy came up from the beach with an armful of them. It’s not the run-of-the-mill kind of day in Millport.”
A Mystery at Sea
No one knows exactly where the sex toys originated. Some residents believe they may have fallen from a cargo ship traveling through the nearby Firth of Clyde, while others suspect they could have drifted from further afield.
Locals have been quick to see the funny side, dubbing the phenomenon “Sex on the Beach” and joking that Hollywood should make a sequel to the classic Scottish comedy Whisky Galore! — this time titled “Toys Galore!”
“I heard around 100 people went down to the beach with bags,” one local quipped. “Not that I know much about these things, but it was definitely dildos. Lots of them!”
A Storm They Won’t Forget
Whether it was a maritime accident or an elaborate prank, the islanders of Millport won’t soon forget the weekend that Mother Nature — and perhaps a misfortunate shipment — delivered something far more unexpected than seaweed and driftwood.
